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Nurturing Self-Love with Crystals and Cacao

Nothing in life is more crucial to our survival, essential to finding our meaning and purpose, and inspirational in helping us to become the best version of ourselves than love. It is that mystical, charmed energy that connects each of us. Instead of focusing on romantic, spiritual, parental, or communal love, this blog is inviting you to focus on the most important love – the love you have for you (self-love). Self-love is important because it is the foundation upon which all our relationships are built. How you choose to display love for yourself is mirrored back in the way others love you. For this month, let’s explore two unconventional ways to demonstrate self-love through crystal and ritual work — both can help you bring in unconditional acceptance of who you are and recognition that you are worthy of love in the present moment just as you are.

Many of us have a self-care system in place. For example, you may have a morning routine that you already follow every day, you may take extra time to cleanse and pamper your skin, you may ensure that you make it to the gym to exercise and eat the best food to nourish your body, you may carve out time each day to stimulate your mind through intellectual books, or you may have a spiritual practice like meditation. All these activities are great demonstrations for self-love; however, this article is going to add two unconventional methods for you to take care of your heart. The first method is using crystals that will help you access the beauty that resides already within you.

Five Crystals to Enhance Self-Love

The following crystals can be used to amplify and bring forward self-love. They teach you to love yourself unconditionally, so you can in turn, give love back to your family, friends, and community. If you feel like you have been lacking in self-love lately, these crystals can help give you a magical boost of encouragement.

  • Ocean Jasper connects you to the Water element and symbolizes the ocean’s influence and strength. The stones whirling designs and hues represent the tide’s ebb and flow, and it induces feelings of peace, tranquility, and emotive balance. Ocean Jasper represents serenity, stillness, steadiness, and emotional healing – particularly with family members, romantic partners, or self-love.  


  • Rhodochrosite unites you to both the Fire and Water elements; the Fire element helps you to transform emotionally, while the Water element allows you to dive into the depths of your emotions and explore your intuition. In addition, rhodochrosite is associated with the heart and solar plexus chakras. The stone invigorates and stabilizes the heart, assisting in emotional healing, encouraging self-love, and cultivating profound compassion, which leads to improved relationships, an increase in empathy, and an overall sense of happiness. For the solar plexus, rhodochrosite empowers and boosts self-confidence. It fosters personal empowerment and heightened self-esteem.


  • Rose Quartz ties you to the Earth element, which provides a calming effect especially if you are experiencing stress, heartbreak, trauma, or grief, and it symbolizes universal, unconditional love. It is beneficial for all the chakras; however, it is more powerful when used with the heart and throat chakra. Rose quartz is beneficial to the circulatory system, and thus the physical heart. Emotionally, it helps you to connect with sensations of pure love, serenity, and self-forgiveness. It is ideal for bringing in self-love to help increase positive energy in your life and for building your self-confidence. When used with the throat chakra, it can help you compassionately verbalize how you feel with those you communicate with.


  • Moonstone is associated with the Water element reflecting its intuitive nature and its ability to mirror and absorb energy near it. While it is linked with benefiting multiple chakras, it is linked to the heart chakra for promoting self-love. Moonstone – especially green moonstone -- brings kindness and nurturing aspects of your personality to the surface. It helps you to realize the importance of creating a relationship with yourself that is filled with gentleness and love. It helps you to stabilize your emotions and accept yourself as you are in the present moment.


  • Malachite is associated with the Earth element, and it is a protective stone that also encourages expansion, growth, and new beginnings. It helps deal with the ebb and flow of emotional relationships, understand that our lives often reflect a cyclic pattern, and helps us to accept change. Malachite is connected to the heart chakra. In terms of self-love, it steers you back to loving yourself, especially if you have neglected yourself because you were placing importance on others. It helps to remove blockages and bring balance back to the heart chakra, especially in the areas that pertain to our own needs and how to communicate them to others.  

When you use any of these stones, hold them over your heart and set the intention to elevate self-love. These crystals assist you in gaining a deeper understanding and acceptance of yourself so you can share the truest, purest version of yourself with others.

Cacao Ritual for Self-Love

In addition to harnessing the healing energy of crystals to enhance self-love, rituals can also bring that into your life. Cacao rituals, which are not new, have been used for thousands of years by the Aztecs and Mayans. The Aztecs saved cacao for their priests and elite men to offer to their gods. The Mayans used cacao on more of a daily basis, but also for marriage ceremonies because of the ability cacao to expand feelings of love.

A cacao ritual offers you an opportunity to esteem and celebrate the most important relationship you have in your life – the relationship you have with you. It is a Divine invitation to reveal the authentic core of who you are and to recognize the power, splendidness, and knowledge that already dwells deep within you while exposing your heart to love, providing you with an insightful connection to your inner self, helping you to magnify and anchor that connection, and uncovering the loveliness that already lives inside your heart and soul. In addition, the Cacao ritual can help empower your connection that you share with others.

So what is cacao? It is the raw, naturally fermented, and unheated form of chocolate. In this form, cacao contains anandamide, theobromine, caffeine, and tryptophan, which facilitates a euphoric feeling that helps people bond during cacao rituals. While you can participate in a group cacao ritual, this exercise is more for the individual wanting to celebrate self-love. Establish a ceremony area in your home or outside where there will be no interruptions, where it is stillness, and where you can place a lovely mat or some fluffy pillows, light some candles, place some greenery and flowers, and maybe even some of the self-love crystals mentioned above. You may even wish to burn some incense or sage to cleanse the space before you begin.

Prepare the ceremonial cacao according to the recipe below.


  • 6 to 7 ounces of filtered water

  • 6 tbs chopped cacao

  • Spice of choice (cayenne pepper, cinnamon, cardamom, or vanilla) to taste

  • Sweetener of choice (honey, agave, cane sugar, etc.) to taste


  1. Chop the cacao into small piece so it will soften in hot water.

  2. Heat the water but take it off the heat source before it boils. Note: If you are going to add chili as a spice, add it to the water before turning on the heat.

  3. Add the cacao into the water.

  4. Add any additional spices and sweeteners.

  5. Whisk the mixture until all the cacao has been incorporated and the top of the drink is frothy.

  6. Serve immediately.

In the middle of your circle, place the cup and the container holding the cacao. As you drink the cacao, concentrate on what you are grateful for. There is a feeling you get from the cacao that can last a few hours, but it is normal to experience sensations of happiness and love, your self-talk to still, and your body to calm because you are retreating into a meditative state filled with immense comfort and release. If you find your heart is racing, please note that it is likely from the caffeine and theobromine in the cacao, but it is allowing more blood flow to your brain, stimulating your heart, and oxygenating your skin because your blood vessels dilate more.

As you feel the cacao take effect, express out loud what you love about who you are. If that is difficult, you could even read some affirmations. Your inner self needs to hear these words expressed. If speaking is difficult, try writing down what comes to mind, and then reading that out loud. The point is to express love for yourself. After that, you may express yourself through dancing or singing – do whatever comes to mind as your heart expands. Be curious about how connected you feel to yourself and even to the world around you.

A cacao ritual is powerful because of the properties of the cacao itself, but also because it is healthy for you. It enhances your mood, is nutrient- and antioxidant-rich, boosts immunity, increases energy, improves memory, reduces heart disease, can burn fat, and it is an aphrodisiac. Lee S. Berk, DrPH, associate dean of research affairs at the School of Allied Health Professions and a researcher in psychoneuroimmunology and food science from Loma Linda University found that that “the higher the concentration of cacao brought about more positive the impact on cognition, memory, mood, immunity and other beneficial effects thanks to the flavonoids contained in the cacao.” All that said, it is worth trying even if for the health benefits alone.

Self-love is important even if society often calls it selfish. How you love yourself establishes the foundation of not only how you love you, but also how others love you. When you practice loving and accepting yourself and seeing your value, you will increase your self-esteem, which results in empowerment. You will be more willing to take care of yourself and protect yourself from people that will deplete you. Moreover, if you have a partner or are opening yourself up to the possibility of inviting a partner in, when you focus on self-love and healing from within, you set healthy boundaries and increase the amount of love you can give. By going deep within and healing, you can open and connect with others in a way that allows for longer, more satisfying relationships that operate out of a place of compassion and acceptance – that truly is embracing living life the happy way.


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